Iceice's World

ya, as title, i am not smart...
i found out that, the way i study is like accepting all the fact from people and never question "why it must be like this?"..
so, i think just live like a robot,
input and output...
i hope i am really smart, like weesiang that kind of smart but not the way of studying..
even i am able to get 100, i feel that i gain nothing..
i wanna live a special life, can i?
i wish i really can but the reality tells me that "u cant!"..
why my life have to be like this? keep repeating and really like a robot!!
haizz..
no matter how, just hope everything will be fine after all..

i was thinking that, exclude my BFF and family,
who else i can talk to when i cant afford anything anymore?
i know probably i can talk to Sharon and Xin Er..
and then who else?
i thought i have a lot of friends here..
Chung ling's guys... however never consider to tell them about me..
does this university still consist of considerate person?

but, everyone has their own problem..
i am not the only human in this world,
so, when u face a problem, just touch the problem, and then think..
by my prof..
however, there is some problems not that u feel like touching then u can just touch it..
preparation is to be made first, or else, probably u will be the one seriously injured..

haiz, after coming here for almost a year,
found out that i have a serious problem..
my thinking is critical! i make decision without analyzing it properly..
like Sharon said, i hardly stand at people's side and think of them..
and i will analyze one by looking at who they mix around..
and i easily set up a mind set about the particular person...
is it i shouldn't be like this?
sometime, i am over believing what i believed..
dont know what to say and dont know how to say..
just feel that, i am no longer a good person..
i treat people badly.. and now, i am worst..
never think of such thing could happen to me..
i am really getting blur now and cannot focus..
probably, in once, too many things come to me and without answer..
it is really a challenge for me now..!
can i overcome it? i wish i can but temporary, i think i am lost and i cant...

is there anyone can help me?
maybe, give me the solution and answer....... T_T

HATEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!
wanna complain!!!
hng...............
crazy......

IT WAS NOT MY FAULT..
I WAS JUST TELLING THE TRUTH!!!!

sometime i really really feel glad to have such senior and friend!
good and helpful and full of "weird" knowledge..
haha, anyway, just to say thank you, Glen..
well, it is not only because he helped me to bring my cream over..
he also is a good friend that will concern about friends...
last night talked to him and he still remember that i have some skin problem and still continuing to question me....
its kinda disgusting but actually i appreciate it as probably i still do not meet anyone concern about me except my family and BFF..
and, haha, i can say that u have a good insight as i am really a good girl!!
anyway, thanks for the praise and concern..
although we do not meet for long, but i know u are a good friend as well~ =)
and if u need someone to talk to, i am available also cause i am very talkative and kaypo actually!! hahaha...!
and fyi, i become lazier not because of your laziness spread to me,
i cant find any motivation and easily emotional affected..
so, just to say, together JIA YOU~~

haiz, as always!! i have stage fright seriously!!
and today = =" being pushed up to stage to perform a song?!
what the, VICTOR CHAN, U MUST ALWAYS REMEMBER THIS DAY!!!
well, sang like shit.. and = =" SERIOUS STAGE FRIGHT LA!!
anyway, still proud to be a chung ling-ian...
haha, cause i met good friends, good seniors....=)
and i met Po Po and Gong Gong today..
she gave me an angpau!!!
she said " thats not much.." but i found xxx inside which is very much as an angpau to give away.................
thanks =)
anyway, special memories today.....

oh my god! addicted to alcoholic drinks!
i have drunk alcoholic drinks consecutively for two days!
well, not too much but i never drink like this last time..
i was addicted since i went to dad's company's dinner..
addicted to the red wine!
and since i went to Singapore, i was feeling so stress..
i know alcoholic drinks cannot curb the problems,
but i not yet drink until drunk..
i was just tasting it all the way~
and although i just came back for a week,
i had tasted 3 types of alcoholic drinks until now!
i love them all actually especially the one made in japan!
anyway, i would like to have a good rest now..
do my lab report and relax~